Sunday, June 19, 2011

My Three Dad's

Father’s Day has meant so many different things to me over the years. 

I was blessed with not just one, but three dads.  It might seem a little strange and I don’t want to go into too much detail, there’s a lot of details, maybe some day. Long story short, my mom and dad, Lynn, were separated when I was 4, she got remarried to Roger, he was in a fatal trucking accident when I was in 8th grade, then she married Darold, and my dad passed away from a heart attack just 2 ½ years ago.

They were and are very uniquely different and wonderful.  As painful as it was losing two of them, they each brought blessings to my life.

My sister, Alyssa, my dad and me.
I didn’t always have the best relationship with my “real” dad, Lynn.  After the divorce, he remarried as well and moved a lot for work.  He was high risk OBGYN, it would be so nice to have his advice during this time in my life when we’re having babiesJ  It was hard to keep in touch and it was never ok between him and my mom, which made it difficult for my sister and I always being in the middle.  He took me to my first concert, Amy Grant.  He took me to watch the Houston Rockets practice and meet the players.  But there were so many missed birthdays, unanswered or unreturned phone calls, just a lack of his presence in my life, that Father’s Day came to not mean as much anymore.  I know God has a reason and plan for everything.  I truly wish we could have mended our relationship, as his life was taken so young and suddenly, now we do not have that chance.  I am still working on forgiving him and myself.  God is helping me with this daily.  I pray that he is sitting in heaven, with his dad, their relationship healed, laughing and having a great time:)  I know he would be so proud to be Hakan’s grandpa and he’s looking down watching over him.  I love you dad.

Me with the chicken pox and Roger at his farm.
Roger.  He taught me so many things, how to ski, how to mow the lawn, how to drive a combine, how to farm, how to do cookies in a car, how to pick your friends and pick your nose, but not your friend’s nose:) most importantly, what it means to be a dad.  He was always laughing, always making jokes.  He would come home from a long day of farming and still have time to talk and listen to me before bed.  He took us on adventures, to Yellowstone, mountains, museums.  He was so smart.  He loved me like his own daughter and I loved him like my own father.  There are times when I long for one of our conversations, or his stories about how things were invented (which were also invented)  I miss him so much.  He passed away over 13 years ago.  I also know that he is looking down and watching over me and my family.  Love you Roger.

Darold holding Hakan at 2 weeks old.
Darold is a wonderful man.  He’s so great with Hakan and has a great sense of humor.  His eyes sparkle when he smiles.  He’s a crazy boat driver when a tube is attached!  He’s always willing to help out, to help fix something.  He’s so kind and I’ve barely ever heard him raise his voice.  Thank you for being a good husband to my mom and step dad to my little sister at home and for being an awesome grandpa to Hakan!
I have learned a lot about fathers throughout my life.  What they should and shouldn’t do. Who they should be.  What it means to be a father.  Not just having a baby makes you a father, there’s so much more.

My boys:)
I see everything a father should be in my husband, Derek.  He not only provides for our family, he’s there for Hakan when he needs him.  Bats and catches with him, throws him in the air, rolls around the floor with him, goes on bike rides, plays at the park, I love watching all of that.  I love hearing Hakan’s giggle when they’re playing.  I can’t wait to see him with our daughter in one week. 

Happy Father’s Day to all the daddy’s!


Laura said...

Lacy this i so beautiful I have tears in my eyes! Really Really touching!

Lacy said...

Thank you so much Laura! We really miss you guys:)